I'll take one cake and... 5 trillion tanks of gas.

Whenever someone has a birthday, a mass email is released in the halls of our inboxes, signaling a fiery and exclamation-point-filled debate on what breed of cake shall grace our kitchenette table.

27 demands/pleas/negotiations later, we giddily arrive at our decision: mil hojas... "even though it will make us fat."

One time, we missed the birthday of the secretary of one of our partners. This heinous error prompted an informal meeting by the café station:

Ay!! Qué hacemos entonces??? Cuándo era?? Cuánto cumple? Ay no puedo creer que lo perdimos!!! (“Ay!! What are we going to do then?? When was it?? How old did she turn?? Ay, I can’t believe we missed it!!!!!”).


When all is said and purchased, I like to check out our spending reports just for kicks. With absurd inflation and ridiculously low gas prices (drinkable water costs more than gas), they generally look like this:

• Five full tanks for gas-guzzling SUVs: $4.12

• Single layer b-day cake with minimal frosting: $107.98